My Way Or The Highway
by Invader Zira
Summary: Kaput's getting tired of doing things Zosky's way... Please read people, or be crisperized.
1. Ground Control To Major Tom

Kaput's POV -

How very typical. Once again, here we are. The same old scene: me and my "friend" Zosky, after having failed miserably, are running right back where we started – Square One. It always ends the same.

There was actually a time where I liked this part of an invasion. The angry crowd at your heels, hopping in that crummy excuse for a spaceship, and then, just as you're trying to catch your breath, the rush you get when you realize that you just barely made it out of there. When you realize that you just cheated an almost certain death. And for a minute, you feel invincible, like you can take on anything. And you think to yourself, "Just bring it."

But that's all gone now. The novelty of the moment has worn off so long ago. I'm tired of _trying_ to rule. _Trying _to dominate. _Trying_ to enslave. And barely getting to crisperize anyone. I wished we didn't have to run away anymore. I wished that for once Zosky and I would be able to hold on to a planet for more than a few days. I wished that for once we would be able to do things my way.

I never got any say in what we did. It was always Zosky's plan we followed. Zosky's ideas we acted upon. Zosky always was the leader of this outfit, and, being the pushover I am, I let him. A lot of the time I didn't mind somebody else being in charge, but even _I _could see that he wasn't fit for the job. I felt that maybe, just maybe, it might be time for someone else to take control.

Zosky's POV –

When we finally got back in the ship, I looked back at Kaput. Just as I was about to say something, I noticed that he looked troubled about something, and I thought I was hallucinating when I saw that he had this look on his face like he was actually . . . _thinking_ .

"Kaput, old buddy, what's on your mind? You look a little blue."

"Nothing, Z, just a little disappointed."

"Wait. Before you say anything, don't worry. We're sure to get the next one. I've got a feeling that next time our plan is definitely going to work. Oh, and already I spy a planet up ahead."

I smiled, trying to act happy in an effort to cheer him up as he landed the ship.

He turned to look at me and said, " Yeah, Z, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. Ya see, I really don't think the plan that we have now is exactly working. I think maybe it might be time to try something new."

"New?" I asked.

"Yeah. I thought maybe we could try things my way this time." He said a bit shyly.

I couldn't help myself. I just laughed. Laughed, laughed, laughed until I was rolling on the floor, crying, and gasping for air.

"You mean just run in there, guns blazing, and just shooting everything in sight? I don't think so, my friend. We're going to try a real plan."

"A real plan, meaning one of your bright ideas? In case you haven't noticed, your plans don't always work! If they did, we wouldn't be here, which is right back where we started! Why don't we try something different for once? Huh? Ya don't know unless you try, right?" He asked, looking like he was barely able to control his anger.

"Kaput, I hardly think that sheer brute force is enough to conquer a planet. You need a plan, some kind of way to keep things in check. If you don't have a plan, -" I tried before I was interrupted by-

"Crisperize the plan! It never works! If you would be a bit less stubborn and try my plan just once, who knows? It just might work! We've tried everything else you wanted to do, and I'm sick of it! Sick I tell ya! For some reason you always get to call the shots, and for once I want to." He said in a low, steady growl, his face looking more and more serious.

"Well, Kaput, if you want to do things your way, you'll have to do it alone, because I am going to rule one day, and I'm not going to let anyone ruin it. I'm truly sad that you feel this way, but either I call the shots or I hit the highway." I said very softly, letting my disappointment be heard.

" My way or the highway, huh?" His anger had reached is crescendo by now.

"Precisely. Well, I guess this is goodbye then, Kaput. Good luck," I said, my voice dripping sarcasm as I wished him luck.

As I walked away, I thought that this was no big deal. Kaput was probably just in a crazy mood. Maybe the heat had gotten to him or something. I had noticed that this planet was excessively hot. I'd simply wait for him to come back and apologize, and we could get back to business. I couldn't help but think that some of what he had said was right, but I wasn't about to let him know that. I had to keep myself calm and cool at all times to make it look like I was fit to be in charge. No way was I going let my guard down now, even to reason with him.

So I would wait. I would simply let him come back to me, and I knew he would. He needed me to help him. We are a team, it had always been that way and it would always be that way. Why? Because even though we would never admit it to anyone else (or each other), we were honestly nothing without one another.

Kaput's POV –

The weirdest thing about leaving Zosky was that I felt like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I was free now. I could do things my way.

As I was walking around, I saw a tiny ship not too different from Zosky's. It wasn't too hard to break into, not even when the owner tried to push me away.

Hey! The guy looked like he needed to walk, anyway.

The ship was much nicer than I thought it would be, you know, with the extra room. Ooh, and a radio! I wasn't able to listen to any music for the longest time after Zosky and I visited Planet Harmony. We shortly found out that our musical tastes were too different to stand. But now I could listen to what I wanted.

As I was flipping through the stations, I came across the old station I used to listen to everyday, and on the radio was playing-

"_Ground control to Major Tom, Ground Control to Major Tom_

_Take your protein pills and put your helmet on._

_Ground Control to Major Tom _

_Commencing countdown, engines on…" _

For some reason the song reminded me of Zosky, so I quickly turned off the radio, twisting the knob so hard I nearly broke it off.

Needing to get away, I flew straight up and the last thing I saw on the planet was Zosky looking up at the ship with a look of shock on his face and running to his own ship.


	2. My Way

AN(I think I kind of let the guys ramble on in this chapter. I also think the thought/internal conflict sequences are bit strange, but, aw well! By the way, I don't own K&Z, or the songs "Ground Control To Major Tom" or "My Way')

Zosky's POV-

I just couldn't believe my eyes. Kaput had really had enough, and now he was gone. I never thought something like this would happen. I truly believed he was happy with his work, but I guess I was… _wrong_. And it took a lot for me to admit that.

All of a sudden, I didn't care how it looked; I had to go talk to him. I bolted to my own ship and flew right up next to him.

"Kaput, what in the name of supernovas are you doing?"

"What? You said this was goodbye. It's over, Zosky. I wish it wasn't, but, obviously, it is."

"I thought you were just acting up! I didn't mean it!"

And as I looked at him, his face turned grave.

"Well, _I_ meant it."

And with that, he zoomed off, leaving me absolutely speechless. Was this really happening? This was a dream, a very bad dream, and any minute now I would wake up.

_Oh, dream on, Zosky. You know very well this is all too real. _

Okay, but how do I fix it? How do I make this right again?

_I don't know, Zosky. I don't know. _

Kaput's POV-

I felt so empowered by what I'd just said. I'd finally mustered up the courage to say what I'd wanted to say all along. It actually was nice to tell the truth. And now that I was free, I decided to get to work, and dominate, Kaput-style.

Zosky's POV-

Still sitting in the ship in shock, I took some time to let all this sink in.

Oh my god. He's really gone.

Come on! You always knew on some level that this was going to happen. It was only a matter of time. You can only push someone so far before they snap.

But I thought he was happy…

Obviously not, Zosky. If was happy, he wouldn't have left. You should have listened to him, but you went on, blissfully unaware of how angry he truly was. Shame on you, Zosky, shame on you. 

Don't you chastise me! I'm his friend, and if he was unhappy, he should have told me.

_Oh, he tried to, many times, but you just ignored him! All you cared about was finding a throne to sit on! You never truly cared about him! All you ever really cared about was yourself, you idiot!_

Wow, that's harsh, but you may just be right.

_No, _we're_ right, numbskull. _Now_ he finally admits he could be wrong… _

Kaput's POV- 

As I was gliding along, I dared to turn that blasted radio on again. This time, though, I switched to some alternative rock station. Some artist I'd never heard of before played a fast-paced, up-tempo song.

"There's a right way 

_Then there's my way _

_There's a highway _

_If you don't like it, you can take it. _

_So just talk away, I don't hear a word you say_

_There's a highway_

_If you don't like it, you can take it. "_

Hey, this guy was good! Powerful lyrics, and a great band to back them up. I liked the guitar in particular. In my opinion, a song without a kickin' guitar solo wasn't a song at all. Whether it was a low bass or the high screams of an electric, I liked all kinds of guitars for some reason.

With this new soundtrack in the background, I was happy. I felt ready to take on a new planet single handedly. I set my sights on a planet a little ways away.

It looked like a simple, tiny, quiet little planet. I looked forward to destroying it.

I stepped out of the ship, and took a moment to look at my surroundings. It, surprisingly, quite nice, if a bit cold. There were gigantic mountains, pine trees, and a seemingly infinite amount of land.

Just out of curiosity, I yelled, "Hey everyone out so's I can massacre ya, massacre ya, massacre ya." But I was greeted only with a flat and empty echo. Hmm. _That_ was odd.

But there has to be at least one person here. Just keep looking until you find someone.

So off I went exploring. I passed through what seemed like miles of snowy plains. But on the horizon, I started to spot something. Was it? No, it couldn't be, I was seeing things. This was like seeing a mirage in the desert, but a lot colder. My mirage was a suburb. Huh, go figure. After seeing all that empty land, all of a sudden, you come up on civilization.

But, nevertheless, I was, of course, happy to see that this planet wasn't completely deserted.

Okay, if I was going to take over this planet, I actually would need a plan. I, mean, it's not like I had Zosky with me, so I couldn't just burst in there, guns blazing. I was flying solo, so, I had to do this carefully. I had to be conspicuous, try not to bring attention to myself while plotting the demise of this puny planet. But first, I had to find somewhere warm.

Zosky's POV-

I just couldn't stop myself; I had to follow Kaput, see what he was doing. Also, partly, to make sure he didn't do anything stupid. Of course, I was still angry at him, but I still thought of him as my friend, so I felt I had to keep an eye on him.

I saw that he had landed on a very cold and desolate planet. Why he had bothered to land there at all was beyond me.

I saw him plow through piles of snow until he finally made it to a very storybook, cookie-cutter looking suburb. Then I saw him take a minute to look at the place. Then he had that same look on his face like he was thinking. It was still _sooo_ scary to see that. But what was even scarier was the look of grim determination that found it's way across face after.

And it was then that I knew. Kaput had moved on. He didn't need me anymore. He was all set to do this by himself. And he was ready to, too. He'd been waiting for this moment his whole life. The moment where he was completely in charge of what he did. The moment that he became his own boss. And now that moment was here.

I also realized that I had had that moment during the entirety of our partnership. It was his turn, but I was sad that it had to happen this way. I was sad that I had just lost my best friend.


End file.
